Must Something Break?

I’ve been thinking a lot lately about things breaking, which isn’t surprising since I took a tumble and broke myself a few weeks ago. I sustained what is really a minor, although very painful, fracture. My self-image, however, was shattered. Then I read the lead story in the Muncie StarPress on Sunday, March 11, which led me to more pondering on the relationship between things breaking and our April theme of Emergence. The article featured Jim Wright and his family of Yorktown. If you missed the original reporting, he and his family were driving in their car when a tree blew over on the car, and all four were injured. Mr. Wright’s injuries left him paralyzed from the chest down. A lot of this follow-up article focused on his reflection on the meaning of what happened to him, and the emergence of a more outspoken and robust Christian faith as a result. I’ll be frank: I have theological problems with the line of reasoning he takes. As a result of the scans done after the accident, doctors discovered blood clots and a cancerous tumor that otherwise would have gone undetected and would probably have been fatal eventually. Mr. Wright believes God allowed the accident to happen because God has a plan, a mission for Mr. Wright. That is vastly different than saying that God caused the accident to happen. His sense of this mission and God’s plan emerged as a result of the terrible breakage of his life endured in the accident. Here’s
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Like a Phoenix

The phoenix of Greek and Roman mythology is a long-living bird that is born from the remains of its predecessor. Accounts of how long it lived, what size it was, its coloration, and the like, are all varied. That variation includes the way in which the phoenix was reborn. According to some accounts the phoenix decomposed before being born again. In other accounts, the phoenix dies amid combustion and flames and rises from the ashes. Regardless of which account we are to give greatest credence to, the phoenix remains an enduring symbol of renewal and emergence in Western culture. The phoenix appears widely in literature, art, music, film, and television. While a mythical creature, the life of the phoenix can serve as a useful metaphor for us. Its emergence, or re-emergence, into the world comes as a result of the death of its predecessor. New life emerges from the passing of the old, and the new cannot arrive until the death of the old. There is surely nothing wrong with us pursuing growth and emergence from nothing. Trying something new, bringing out a new behavior, or creating a new way of thinking about something are often great moments of transformation for our lives and something we should often strive for. But what if there are times when something new is unable to emerge? What if something old is holding up the arrival of something new? For example, if we’re holding onto an old pain, perhaps playing memories over and over again, it
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At the Still Point of the Turning World

“Time present and time past Are both perhaps present in time future And time future contained in time past…. Time past and time future What might have been and what has been Point to one end, which is always present. At the still point of the turning world. Neither flesh nor fleshless; Neither from nor towards; at the still point, there the dance is, But neither arrest nor movement. And do not call it fixity, Where past and future are gathered. Neither movement from nor towards, Neither ascent nor decline. Except for the point, the still point, There would be no dance, and there is only the dance. I can only say, there we have been: but I cannot say where. And I cannot say, how long, for that is to place it in time.” ~T.S. Eliot As I began thinking about this month’s theme of balance, these lines from the fourth of T.S. Eliot’s “The Four Quartets” came to my mind. This has been one of my favorite poems since I first read it (for a real treat, click here to hear Eliot himself read the entire selection). I’ve frequently joked that the way I maintain balance is by falling off opposite sides of Eliot’s “still point” alternately. That, however, isn’t at all an adequate way of attaining balance! Many psychologists, spiritual teachers and life coaches have tried to limn what constitutes a balanced life. I wouldn’t have thought there could be so many diagrams devoted to expressing the concept of life balance visually. Overlapping circles. Various arrangements of arrows. Arrows and circles. Squares
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Balance

The March 19th, 1945 edition of Life magazine contains an article written by Annalee Jacoby titled “Eggs stand on end in Chungking: The mystery of the upright eggs dissolves war tension in China.” In the article, Jacoby tells the story of several Chinese individuals competitively balancing eggs on the spring equinox. According to Chinese legends, for an hour before and after the seasons change on Li Chun (Spring Begins), it becomes possible to balance things that would otherwise not be possible. In the city of Chungking (now rendered into English as Chongqing) inhabitants balanced eggs on Li Chun. The celebration of Li Chun in 1945 happened to draw the attention of a journalist with the United Press. His story was published in many English-language newspapers. Apparently, Albert Einstein read the story and doubted its truthfulness. A series of egg-standings with witnesses followed in Chongqing to prove it was done without trickery. And there was no trickery. With the right egg and surface, you can stand an egg any day of the year. While the spring equinox does not bring about a perfect balance in gravity, it does bring other kinds of balance. Daytime and nighttime are balanced. The time of each is roughly equal, and this is true no matter where you are on the planet. The path of the sun is also in balance. The sun rises exactly due east and sets exactly due west; the two equinoxes are the only days this happens. The seasons are also balanced. At
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Three Lessons in Perseverance

1. A Dog and a Sandbank: If at First… The house where we live in Florida is built on one-story concrete pilings due to its being beachfront. Our access to the beach entails going down off our deck, across a small backyard, over the dune walkover, and then down a slight sandy embankment to the beach. Usually. Since the last time we were here, fierce winds and churning surf have sculpted that gentle slope into a four-foot high sand cliff. Getting to the beach has been quite a scramble. The shape of the bank changes daily, adding to the excitement. Our dog Callum provides me with a fine example of perseverance in the face of this sand cliff. She had certainly not seen anything like that before! When we went down to the beach the first time, she paused, looked over the cliff, and tried to make her way around it. She soon realized this wasn’t an option, since the cliff stretched for miles. I will admit, my initial response was to walk the block or so down the road to a public beach access, thinking that repair crews might have restored access at public sites first. Not at that beach anyway. It was in the same condition. Determination won out, and we returned to our own beach access. Still excited even in the face of the trouble we were having, Callum cocked her head, looked over the brink, and launched herself into the air, landing at the base of the cliff in a flurry
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Perseverance & Spiritual Practices

In my Unigram article last month, I wrote about the application of intention to everyday tasks to transform them to spiritual practices. In that piece I noted how through intention I could transform some walks in Nature into spiritual experiences, raising them above the everyday and ordinary. Yet applying intention to everyday things to gain a spiritual practice is not a strategy that will be equally rewarding to everyone. It may also work better with some tasks than others. As a result, you may wish to seek out a spiritual practice that requires the application of perseverance. Some authorities on spiritual practices maintain that the most transformational potentials come from those spiritual practices that are nothing other than a spiritual practice for us. Take meditation, for instance. Meditation is something we purposefully do as a spiritual practice that we generally do not otherwise do in the course of our everyday lives. By being inherently spiritual, it becomes easier to distinguish it from everyday activities and emphasize its spiritual value. For example, taking a walk in Nature can have more than one meaning for me. As a result, it may be more difficult to stay focused on the spiritual. I could potentially, then, complete it sometimes with a sense of spiritual pride, but really have been focused on exercise or covering a lot of ground. Something like meditation, on the other hand, cannot be completed in any way other than spiritually. When we use everyday things as a spiritual practice, there can
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Intention & Spiritual Practices

For years I felt that my desire and intention for spiritual practices was greater that my familiarity with them. By this I mean that my interest was high, but my knowledge was low and limited to a handful of practices common to our culture, such as prayer, reading scripture, and meditation. Perhaps you too have felt similarly, now or in the past, and craved spiritual exercises, but could not find ones that suited you. Because Unitarian Universalism embraces religious freedom of the individual, we do not possess an obvious and widespread set of spiritual practices outside of collective worship, in the way some other religions do. What is likely the easiest path to a spiritual practice is by adding intentional mindfulness to the passions you already hold. Mindfulness is fully bringing our attention to the experience of the present moment. The opposite of mindfulness would be to engage in tasks on auto-pilot, without thought or awareness. In what has became a famous example of mindfulness and intentionality, Zen Buddhist monk and author Thich Nhat Hanh wrote in Creating True Peace (pgs. 143-44 ) about eating an orange as a spiritual exercise of mindfulness. We could simply eat an orange as a piece of food. Or, says Hanh, we could eat the orange meditatively, appreciating it as a miracle of nature that nourishes us. Peel it and focus on how it feels. Smell it. Savor it as you eat it. Imagine the sun and rain it took to nourish the fruit. Imagine
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Long-Haul Hope

Sometimes, I worry about hope. Huh? Why would anyone worry about hope? Psychologists tell us that we simply fare better if we have hope. It’s one of the attitudes Saint Paul counseled the Christians at Corinth to maintain, along with faith and love (1 Corinthians 13:13). One source lists some of its synonyms: aspiration, desire, wish, expectation, ambition, aim, goal, plan. What could be the harm in any of these? One of my mentors in the Buddhist tradition, Thich Nhat Hanh, says of hope, “Hope is important because it can make the present moment less difficult to bear. If we believe that tomorrow will be better, we can bear a hardship today,” (Peace is Every Step). So what gives? Here’s my concern: Hope sometimes pulls me out of the present, means that I’m projecting my energies on some future point, goal, or aspiration. When I’m doing that, I am less grounded in the present. I’m less focused on living creatively in the present, especially with whatever aspect of the present I would prefer to be different. Recently, I read a description of hope that appealed to me and addressed these concerns. What’s interesting is that the author was not describing hope! She was describing acceptance, but she describes a hope that makes sense to me. This hope “does not mean denying or diminishing life’s suffering….And it certainly doesn’t mean having a blindly optimistic ‘Pollyanna’ attitude. [Hope] doesn’t mean we have to like or be glad for everything that happens….Rather, it is the
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Simple (and Not-So-Simple) Abundance

I showered in a rainbow one afternoon awhile back. Let me explain. We have a large skylight in our bathroom. Late in the afternoon, the sunlight shining in through the skylight glints on the water streaming out of the shower at just the right angle, turning it into myriad droplets of rainbow. Then there is the dialogue that took place in my kitchen recently. Our three-year-old grandson had arrived to spend the day with us, as he usually does on Wednesdays. I had given him his breakfast, and needed to step around the corner into the next room for a moment. From the next room, I became aware of a lively discussion going on in the kitchen. Roland was carrying on a dialogue in two distinctly different voices. Stealthily, I peeked around the corner. The discussion was between…. two dried Bing cherries, one grasped in each firm fist! My black lab-redbone hound mix dog has a favorite resting position: on her back, back legs stretched back, front legs extended over her head. Often, she leans up against a piece of furniture, or the side of the house if she’s outdoors, so she doesn’t have to hold herself up. To say she looks lovably silly is an understatement. It always brings a smile to my face, and usually gets her a belly rub as well. For me, the key thing here is being aware, awake, enough, and slowing down enough to notice these moments. To pay attention. Can I allow myself the time to
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From the Stories of Our Living

There’s a lot to like in the hymn “The Fire of Commitment.” I won’t speculate on what all Mary Katherine Morn and Jason Shelton, who penned the lyrics, wanted their words to say. I’m sure it’s a lot broader than my interpretation of the small part that gives the hymn a very special meaning for me, and usually leaves me with tears in my eyes when we sing it: “From the stories of our living rings a song both brave and free, Calling pilgrims still to witness to a life of liberty.” Many, if not most of you, know the rudiments of my story. I’m a survivor. Briefly, my father sexually abused me in several ways from the time I was four or maybe five years old until my parents divorced and he moved out when I was twelve. There was also emotional and physical abuse, and the effects of his alcoholism and womanizing affected our family dynamics as well. Working through that part of my life story with a compassionate, caring and competent listener who had a seemingly endless capacity to walk beside me into the scary, shaming, grieving places of my life made healing possible. As we tell our stories in an open, nonjudgmental space, new possibilities emerge, which can translate into a life far different than we had imagined possible. As we tell our stories, we piece together our wholeness, bringing together those parts of ourselves that have been shattered and split off by the external circumstances of our lives, or those
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