“We, the member congregations of the Unitarian Universalist Association, covenant to affirm and promote the right of conscience and the use of the democratic process within our congregations.” -Unitarian Universalist Fifth Principle. Stated more simply, “we believe that all persons should have a vote about the things that concern them.” I came across an interesting take on this recently and want to share it.
“Five Habits to Heal the Heart of Democracy” was written by Parker Palmer and posted by the Global Oneness Project. He begins with a quotation from Terry Tempest Williams which she notes that “the first home of democracy” is within the human heart. Democracy takes root in our hearts when we “resolve to act courageously, relentlessly, without giving up” as we craft a living democracy. Palmer’s essay is directed at our national democracy. It applies equally well to the life of our congregation. The foundation of democracy resides not in our bylaws, not in our Fifth Principle, nor even in the process we saw at work in the August 4th congregational meeting, but in our hearts.
He describes five enduring predispositions of the heart that he deems important for a democracy to flourish. First, we must realize that, despite our rampant individualism, we are profoundly connected to all that is. We are connected to other humans, of course—not just to those humans we feel connected to, but to all other humans. And not just to humans. Absolutely everything is connected in an endless and timeless web of being, which our seventh Principle affirms. We UUs do cherish our independence and individuality, and well we should. But we also cherish our membership is a community of things much larger than that, including our congregation.
As I listened to people’s comments during the August 4th congregational meeting, I heard this principle being affirmed. “Just remember,” speaker after speaker said in one way or another, “we’re in this together. We are the church.
Second, while we value our interconnectedness, we must embrace the values contained within “otherness.” Us and them does not have to be us against them. It can be us together, it can be us and others expanding each other’s experience and opening up new and intriguing horizons for our exploration. It can be us coming together to create something far larger than the sum of each of us. To value the otherness of the other is to respect the inherent worth and dignity of each of us, affirmed in our first principle. We have given ourselves the opportunity to create something new out of the tensions that have been simmering over the last few years, something different and perhaps larger than any of us can yet envision.
Third, the juxtaposition of otherness with connection inevitably breeds tension. Being committed to both is something of a paradox. We can, however, use this tension to grow rather than to lash out or to shut down. “The genius of the human heart,” Palmer writes, “lies in its capacity to use these tensions to generate insight, energy, and new life.” Without the interplay of otherness in connection, we stagnate. With that interplay, we can change and grow, and discover new ways of being and doing church here at UUCM. Out of our differing viewpoints there can arise something new.
Fourth, every person should have a vote about the things that concern them. We all need as Palmer says, a “sense of personal voice and agency.” Part of what has happened in our congregation, it seems to me, is that some individuals and groups feel “disempowered by a complex and domineering system in which I have no voice.” That’s not a direct quote, but I’ve heard people voice variations of this feeling both about our own congregation and about the UUA as a national body. Being heard and having a sense of personal agency does not mean that we will always get our own way. It does mean that we can feel we are an important part of decisions that are made and actions that are taken. It means that we can be confident we will be respected even when we differ. It means we can all move forward, together.
I saw and heard this in our congregational meeting as well. Clearly, 41 of those present didn’t “get their way.” But the process allowed their voices to be heard. This lays the groundwork for moving forward. I truly hope that some those who spoke so poignantly about feeling disempowered and not heard felt some sense of having been heard.
Finally, Palmer writes, we must find ways to create community among us. Community doesn’t just happen; it is intentional. We need the “steady companionship of kindred spirits” who both support us and challenge us to speak and act, and who can help us keep going when we are depleted and discouraged. We can take our distinctive and partial truths, our varied perspectives and experiences, and weave them all into something more. We’ve not always been good at doing this. Our individual free and responsible searches for our own truth and meaning can become something much larger as we seek ever greater meaning and truth together.
The process and the discussion that began with the presentation of the petition to our Board has challenged us, to be sure. I hope that all of us found those who could “help us keep going when we are depleted and discouraged.” I know I did.
This is the challenge and the promise of the Fifth Principle (and all the principles) for our congregation: to view them and use them not just as principles in the front of the hymnal, occasionally affirmed in a service, but as the promise of what human community at its best can be. What we can be.
We have begun.
Rev. Julia